At a certain age
Said the wise old sage
We hit a moment of complete and utter truth, a deep sense of knowing who we truly are. An unapologetic time to get rid of the small nonsense, the petty gossip, the naysayers, the not so well wishers or supporters of our chosen path. There comes a time when rose coloured glasses are lifted and the only glasses are the love-shades I wear for myself. My true life journey, (and I have chosen a spiritual one) is one of self growth and healing, to commit to a path of self love.
This does come with some discomfort especially if you have been a people pleaser like myself for over half a century. To be able to set boundaries and surround myself with those people who are aligned with my highest and best takes some conscious effort. A lot of people are born or become quite the opposite of this “pushover” archetype I have been, the opportunistic, narcissistic, controlling or entitled, of whom I’ve attracted my fair share.
This path to our own enlightenment is definitely not an easy one, one layer peeled off painfully at a time as we unveil our glorious selves. A light to shine unabashedly and obviously with the right intentions. To find the courage in myself, to put my own ego aside and, to develop the love and grounded surety for myself, to fill my own cup to help inspire or empower as many others as we can is in my opinion the most worthwhile journey.
As Marianne Williamson so beautifully wrote. This quote by the way is what Nelson Mandela’s used in his speech when he walked to freedom with the great hope for the future of my homeland.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us”
I am so thankful I have my family, friends, colleagues and Singita Wellness members, Barbados and my treasured Online Community, as well as guests who fill my soul everyday with their loving uplifting appreciation for life and everything I put my heart and soul into. Singita Wellness has helped provide for many a safe haven, a nurturing uplifting community. As we know, movement heals, and at Singita not only do we offer yoga and fitness classes in our tranquil white washed studio. We also offer healing sessions, meditation sessions and spa treatments.
I am happy to acknowledge that the community we are attracting at Singita Wellness are aligned with our highest and best. I am so thankful that most people walking through our doors are just lovely souls. We are a peaceful nurturing community and I am proud to have such experienced therapists, instructors and support staff to provide this foundation.
I do now set firmer boundaries, as of course there are times when people cross my path who may not have the best intentions. I am also better at ‘listening to my gut’ and spotting these types, and try to act with integrity, without offending.
As my most inspiring friend and colleague, spiritual healer/coach Patti Wilson has explained to me, “this is wonderful as now you are evolved enough that this is not happening in your inner circle “
Patti explains: “Prior to developing my psychic abilities as a spiritual coach, I was a psychotherapist for over thirty years. We all have the impulse to develop and grow throughout our lives, and that growth is inevitably ignited by conflict with others. Conflict is our greatest teacher, as it is through examining our differences and our own shortcomings that we feel the pressure to make changes. It has been my observation that we begin our journeys of growth and change through struggles with intimate others—typically family members, close friends, and love relationships. I call this our “inner circle” of relationships. Then as we master these changes, we may see the same issues pop up, but involving people that aren’t as important to us, such as neighbors or work colleagues—people no longer in our inner circle. These conflicts are easier to manage and less upsetting. We have mastered the new skills and abilities, and are just getting some final practice with people who aren’t so important to us!
Take Michelle’s sharings, for example: she learned to set boundaries around people-pleasing in her marriage, and now is energetically attracting much easier conflict situations with others in her community, where she continues to affirm her new boundaries. Having moved to an “outer circle” of relationships, Michelle can celebrate that her hard work with intimate others was all worth it!”
I have had to take off my rose-coloured glasses and look myself squarely and clearly in the face and know if I do not find the love for myself, the self respect, the ability to set clear loving boundaries, I would never reach the vision and dream of the person I intend to evolve into, and the goals and vision I intend to create business wise.
The path of growth and development is challenging but so worth it.
With love, Michelle x
PS. Patti Wilson, M.A., M.Ed. will be running one of her amazing courses on ‘Finding and Creating the Love Partnership You Desire’. For more information on her work, click here.